Although today is Fun Lunch Friday, these last few days have been anything but fun. As I sat done to prepare for Fun Lunch Friday, I just couldn’t get my spirit together. Something just wasn’t right and I had to get it out before I could move on. Today, we will not have an audio devotional. But instead, below are the thought that I processed while trying to grasp all this. I encourage you to take some time and process your thoughts as well. I have a diverse audience and in no way is this post intended for one group of people. We are ALL children of God and He loves us ALL the same. Be blessed and have a safe weekend.
I hate that I woke up with that feeling in my stomach.
I hate that I’m expected to carry on with my day; life as usual.
I hate that we are being programmed to view this as normal.
I hate that as I walk through my office and pass the desks of black men, who come to work proudly to accomplish the “mission” and assist in the protection of this country, they can’t expect the same protection of their lives.
I hate that today, I have spent countless hours trying to analysis, rationalize and make logical sense of all this.
I hate that I have come up with nothing.
I hate that every time I passed someone, other than a black person, I thought, “do you even know?”
I hate that I’m not surprised that another black man has become a hashtag.
I hate that every time this happens, I feel like I’m not doing enough.
I hate that today, as I watched the news in the cafe at work, a caucasian lady talking to someone else mentioned how sad and crazy it was and she would have never thought to pull her phone out to video record the incident.
I hate that this has now become OUR reality.
I hate that I questioned even saying anything at all, due to fears of who I might offend.
I hate that my choice to operate my First Amendment Right, may be looked upon as a threat to some.
I hate that even though I know the Bible says, “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away,” I still have these feelings.
Biblical Reference: Revelation 21:4